April Declaration
by AnonymousBuono
Summary: Five years after Kaori Miyazono passes away, Kousei Arima lives on. Returning to his hometown for his coming of age ceremony, he reminisces on his past, and finally writes a letter in reply to Kaori's.


Setting: Five years after the conclusion of the anime.

Character(s): Kousei Arima

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 _April Declaration (_ _四月宣言_ _)_

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Hey, Kaori, how have you been?

It's strange... I was fully prepared to call you Miyazono-san for a moment, but I guess it's inappropriate now.

I'm doing well. March has ended, and April has come again. Pretty soon, it'll be the six year anniversary of when I first met you.

I was a complete wreck back then, wasn't I? I guess I worried you a little, right? There I was, a walking icon of depression and trauma. But it was you who made me realize that even darkness can shine like a starry sky. I'm totally fine now, thanks to you.

It's weird. Even though it's already been five years since you've become one with the light, it's like you're still around somehow. Memories of my time with you are spread around all throughout town. If I listen carefully, I can still hear your voice throughout the city, coloring the city in orange imagery like your violin playing would have.

It's been pretty boring without you around, especially since the rest of us have been split up to different high schools and futures...

I would say that I'm lonely, but I know you'd just laugh at me, in a good way. I still keep in contact with everyone, and, in a way, they're all still close by my side. Together, they light up my life almost like you would have.

There are times where it isn't enough, where the loss of you and mother are too much, but, remembering your smile never fails to make me smile, too. And now that I'm back, it's like your memory is lighting up our hometown with your orange aura.

I remember you whenever I pass by your family's bakery, and smell the scent of the goods. I still get canelés sometimes, if I feel as though I'm about to give up or forget who I am. It won't be good if that happens, right? Those times will come again, and then you won't be there to save me. I promise it won't happen, since you're still living on in my heart.

I remembered you when I went back to the school to visit Koharu-chan. Do you know her? She's Hiroko's daughter. She's already started her first year of middle school… Time sure flies, right? It's precious, and I promise I won't waste it. Wasn't this something else that you taught me?

I remembered you when I visited Watari in the hospital for his leg injury, and he gave me the rest of your cute stationery. You know, the one that you got from that store you dragged me to? I remember that day, it was the same day you took me with you to visit the school. Looking back, it should have been obvious that it's always been me, and not him. I'm a little dense I guess…

But what reminds me of you most of all is my piano. Each time I play, you're right there with me, playing along. I can hear the notes now, and how the music creates a light that only you can see. It's beautiful… It makes me want to remember today, and each and every day, even in the past. No, especially in the past. Memories are precious, and it's because of them that I can go towards the future… Closer to the light.

Ah, wait, I guess I should explain Watari's situation, huh? Before you get worried…

After middle school, and the loss of his last game, he had to fight tooth and nail to continue doing soccer. He actually made it onto a professional team last year, but there was an accident with some players from another team. I don't know many of the details, but, either way, his legs are completely paralyzed. He won't be playing anymore.

It was, it was… _painful_ , seeing Watari's timidity, his weakness. He's never shown that side of himself to us before, and it worries me.

Is this how you felt when you met me? You still had your own struggles, yet you were fine somehow, you were so _free_. Was it because you were free that you were able to notice my pain?

We've been trying to save him, Tsubaki and I both have, just like how you saved me with your light. And he's persevering, him and his wheelchair. He won't be able to play, but he'll find another path to walk on. Tsubaki and I, as his friends, and Kashiwagi-san, as his girlfriend of two years, will make sure of it.

I know you said that Watari wouldn't remember you... but it's not true at all. He remembers, we all do, and it gives us strength, all of us. You've influenced everyone so much, in the same way that I know you'll say that I've influenced everyone, too. It'd be impossible to forget someone like you.

I think he knew the whole time. Watari told me that he knew my own feelings for you from the beginning; and, as he was giving me your stationery, he said some things that made me wonder if he knew about _your_ lie from the beginning, too. Watari gets underestimated a lot for how perceptive he is. Maybe this ability to notice things is why he's able to date Kashiwagi-san.

Ah, I haven't said anything about Tsubaki yet. She's studying at a university now. She was like Watari in the sense that she really had to fight to get there. She doesn't want to be a professional baseball player, but I think she's studying to become a teacher. It fits her well I think.

You know, this April day was the first time I saw any of them in a while. We've all come together back in our hometown for our coming of age ceremony: Tsubaki, Watari, Kashiwagi-san, Aiza-kun, Igawa-san, and I. I actually just turned 20 in March, it feels strange to be at a coming of age ceremony so soon after turning 20, when Watari had to wait almost a whole year. I guess that's the disadvantage of having a birthday in April, but, then again, having a birthday in April also means that he gets to cherish his youth more.

Will you join us for the coming of age ceremony? Shining down upon the city with your orange light, just like at my piano performances.

Speaking of, I suppose you want to hear what I've been up to, right? Since my high school graduation, I've been traveling around with my piano playing, and entering competitions like always. There's not much to it, I guess. Sorry I can't tell you anything interesting about me...

On the other hand, Aiza-kun's younger sister has just graduated from high school. She's just starting university to become a piano teacher and compose music on the side. I know she'll do well.

Igawa-san is already a composer. Did you know she did a score for an anime? She teamed up with Aiza-kun, it's rather impressive. I'm sure you'll like it.

I still see them both at competitions sometimes, whenever we happen to be in the same country. And last time I saw Aiza-kun, he told me that he was going to propose to Igawa-san two years after the coming of age ceremony. He has a plan and everything, it's cute, in a way.

Oh, one last thing. We haven't been dating or anything, Tsubaki and I that is, just carrying on how we usually do. Even though she can't be by my side while she's at university, she still keeps her promise by calling me a lot. Sometimes it happens at inconvenient times. I once forgot to take my phone out of my pocket in a competition, and it rang in the middle of my performance. Do you remember that? It was really embarrassing.

Ah, but, you know, Tsubaki and I promised to get married after she graduates and gets a stable job. If you were still in this world, do you think you and I would have gotten married instead? I sure think so, but now, you don't need marriage to stay by my side forever, do you? Just the light.

Are you okay with this? It's fine if it's Tsubaki, though, right? I can't imagine getting married to anyone except you or her. We've been best friends and neighbors for the longest time anyway, so, in a way, getting married won't be changing much, I guess.

How are you? Are you doing well? What's it like up in the light? Are you in Heaven, or are you reincarnated? Are you a ghost? Will I encounter you in the next life? I really hope so.

Ah, a tear landed on this letter. Sorry, I couldn't help but cry just a little. It's… I mean… I guess I... that is... I sometimes feel _guilty_. Guilty for being alive when you're not. But then, I remember you, Kaori, and your smile. You would want me to continue on, right? Continue on towards the future and the light.

And, so I will. I won't give up, and I won't bend halfway, for your sake.

Thank you so much, Kaori, for your love, for your memory, for your lessons, for your help, for your determination and excitement, for your strength, for your weakness, for your smile, for being yourself, for being free.

I'm off to the future.

Signed, Kousei Arima.

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諦めない 途中で曲げない

いつまでも 初心忘れない

時間と言う 貴重なものを

無駄にはしたくない

さあ 行くよ 未来へ

\- ℃-ute (2010)


End file.
